Clever Grethel (Grimm)
Division into chapters is editorial.
Grethel the cook: her vanity and habits
There once lived a cook named Grethel who took great pride in her appearance, particularly her shoes adorned with red rosettes. When she walked out wearing them, she would turn this way and that, admiring herself and thinking what a pretty girl she was. Her vanity was matched only by her love of drink and food.
And when she came home she drank, in her gladness of heart, a draught of wine, and as wine excites a desire to eat, she tasted the best of whatever she was cooking
Preparing the feast: two fowls for a guest
One day her master approached her with a special request.
He told her that a guest would be coming that evening and instructed her to prepare two fowls very daintily. Grethel assured him she would see to it. She killed the two fowls, scalded them, plucked them clean, and put them on the spit. As evening approached, she set them before the fire to roast. The fowls began to turn a beautiful brown color and were nearly ready, but the guest had not yet arrived. Concerned that the perfectly cooked fowls would be ruined, Grethel called out to her master about the delay. Her master decided to go fetch the guest himself rather than let the meal be spoiled.
First temptations: wine and the first fowl
As soon as her master had turned his back, Grethel laid the spit with the fowls aside and began to rationalize her next actions. Standing so long by the fire had made her hot and thirsty, and who knew when they would return? She decided to run down to the cellar for a drink. There she set up a jug, blessed it for her use, and took not just one but several hearty draughts of wine. Returning to her duties, she put the fowls back over the fire and basted them, driving the spit merrily round. But as the roast meat smelled so deliciously good, a new temptation arose.
Something might be wrong, it ought to be tasted!... Ah! how good fowls are! It certainly is a sin and a shame that they are not eaten directly!
She ran to the window to check if her master was returning with his guest, but saw no one. Returning to the fowls, she noticed that one of the wings was burning and decided she had better remove and eat it to prevent waste. After enjoying the wing thoroughly, she reasoned that the other wing must go down too, or else her master would notice something was missing. When both wings were consumed, she looked again for her master and still did not see him.
Complete downfall: devouring the second fowl
It suddenly occurred to Grethel that perhaps they were not coming at all and had stopped somewhere else along the way. This thought provided her with the perfect excuse for what came next.
Hallo, Grethel, enjoy yourself... take another drink, and eat it up entirely; when it is eaten you will have some peace, why should God's good gifts be spoilt?
So she ran back to the cellar, took an enormous drink, and ate up the entire first chicken with great glee. When one chicken was completely consumed and her master still had not returned, Grethel looked at the remaining fowl and continued her justifications.
Where one is, the other should be likewise, the two go together; what's right for the one is right for the other; I think if I were to take another draught it would do me no harm.
Following this logic, she took another hearty drink and let the second chicken rejoin the first in her stomach.
Clever deception: saving herself through trickery
Just as Grethel was finishing her feast, her master returned and called out for her to hurry because the guest was coming directly after him. She calmly answered that she would soon serve up the meal. Meanwhile, her master checked that the table was properly set and took out the great carving knife, which he began sharpening on the steps. Soon the guest arrived and knocked politely at the door. Grethel ran to see who was there, and when she saw the guest, her quick wit devised a cunning plan to save herself.
She put her finger to her lips and warned him to get away quickly, claiming that while her master had indeed invited him to supper, his real intention was to cut off the guest's ears. As proof, she told him to listen to the sound of the knife being sharpened. The terrified guest heard the sharpening and hurried away as fast as he could. Grethel then ran screaming to her master, claiming that he had invited a fine guest who had stolen both chickens right off the dish and run away with them. Her master, lamenting the loss of his fine chickens, ran after the guest with the knife still in his hand, crying 'Just one, just one!' meaning the guest should leave him at least one chicken. But the guest, thinking the master wanted one of his ears, ran even faster to keep both ears safely attached to his head.