The Good Bargain (Grimm)
Short summary
A German countryside, fairy tale times. A peasant sold his cow for seven thalers. On his way home, he heard frogs croaking what sounded like "eight."
Angry that they wouldn't accept his count of seven, he threw his money into the pond. When the frogs didn't return it, he left. Later, he killed another cow and gave the meat to dogs who barked "wow," which he took as a promise to pay. When the butcher refused payment after three days, the peasant complained to the King. His story made the King's daughter laugh for the first time ever.
I cannot give you justice in this, but you shall have my daughter to wife... in her whole life she has never yet laughed as she has just done at thee.
The peasant refused the marriage. The King offered 500 thalers instead. The peasant promised shares to a soldier and a Jew, who received beatings instead of money. The King let the peasant fill his pockets from the treasury. When a Jew reported him for insulting the King, the peasant cleverly proved the Jew a liar and kept all his money.
Detailed summary
Division into chapters is editorial.
The peasants foolish bargain with the frogs
A peasant sold his cow at the fair for seven thalers and headed home with his earnings. As he approached a pond, he heard frogs croaking their natural call of "aik, aik, aik, aik." The peasant misunderstood this sound, believing the frogs were saying "eight" and arguing that he had received eight thalers instead of seven.
Annoyed by what he perceived as their incorrect counting, the peasant tried to correct the frogs by shouting that it was seven thalers, not eight. When the frogs continued their croaking, he decided to prove his point by counting out his money, showing them the seven thalers with twenty-four groschen each. Still the frogs persisted with their "aik, aik, aik, aik."
What," cried the peasant, quite angry, "since you are determined to know better than I, count it yourselves," and threw all the money into the water to them.
The peasant waited for the frogs to finish counting and return his money, but they simply continued croaking and never threw the coins back. Eventually he gave up and went home empty-handed, cursing the frogs as water-splashers and goggle-eyes.
The dogs promise and the butchers stick
After losing his money, the peasant bought another cow, slaughtered it, and planned to sell the meat in town for profit. At the town gate, he encountered a pack of dogs led by a large greyhound that barked "wow, wow, wow" at the meat.
The peasant interpreted the dog's barking as a request for the meat and entered into a conversation with the animal. When the dog continued barking "wow, wow," the peasant asked if it would promise not to devour all the meat and guarantee payment from its companions.
Well, if thou insistest on it, I will leave it for thee... but this I tell thee, I must have my money in three days or else it will go ill with thee.
The peasant left all the meat with the dogs and returned home, confident he would be paid. After three days passed without payment, he went to the town butcher demanding his money. The butcher thought it was a joke and became angry when the peasant insisted the great dog had delivered a whole slaughtered cow.
The butcher drove the peasant out with a broomstick, leaving him once again without payment for his goods.
Making the princess laugh and refusing marriage
Seeking justice, the peasant went to the royal palace and requested an audience with the king. He told his complete story about how the frogs and dogs had taken his money and the butcher had beaten him with a stick. The king listened to this absurd tale alongside his daughter.
The king's daughter burst into hearty laughter at the peasant's ridiculous story. The king, delighted that someone had finally made his daughter laugh, offered her hand in marriage as a reward, since he had promised her to whoever could make her laugh.
Oh," answered the peasant, "I will not have her, I have a wife already, and she is one too many for me; when I go home, it is just as bad as if I had a wife standing in every corner.
The king grew angry at this rejection and called the peasant a boor. The peasant replied with rustic wisdom, asking what could be expected from an ox but beef. The king then offered an alternative reward of five hundred coins, to be collected in three days.
Selling the kings reward before receiving it
As the peasant left the palace, a sentry asked for a share of the promised reward. The peasant agreed to give him two hundred coins. A Jewish money changer who overheard the conversation offered to exchange the remaining three hundred for smaller coins immediately, rather than waiting for the large thalers.
The peasant made both deals, selling his entire reward before receiving it. When he appeared before the king three days later, he explained that he no longer owned the five hundred coins, having already given them away to the soldier and the Jew.
The treasure chamber and the peasants final triumph
The king ordered the peasant's coat removed so he could receive his five hundred blows instead of coins. The soldier and Jew, who had come to claim their shares, received the beating they had bargained for. The soldier bore it patiently, but the Jew complained bitterly about receiving heavy blows instead of heavy thalers.
The king's anger dissolved into laughter at the peasant's cleverness. As compensation for losing his reward before receiving it, the king allowed the peasant to take as much money as he wanted from the royal treasure chamber. The peasant stuffed his pockets full and went to an inn to count his wealth.
The Jew followed and overheard the peasant muttering complaints about the king's deception. The Jew reported this to the king, hoping for a reward. When summoned, the peasant borrowed the Jew's coat to appear properly dressed before the king, then cleverly turned the accusation back on the Jew by claiming he was wearing the Jew's coat, proving the Jew's dishonesty.
The peasant, however, went home in the good coat, with the good money in his pocket, and said to himself, "This time I have hit it!"