Ugly Love (Hoover)/Chapter 12
from the Collection “Ugly Love”
Chapter Summary
Six years earlier, Miles and Rachel had spent a month living in the same house while secretly dating. They had relaxed their rules to allow kissing behind locked doors, but still prohibited sex and sneaking around at night.
Rachel's mother, Lisa, sometimes checked on her during the night. Miles resented this obstacle, though he recognized that Lisa was acting as a responsible parent to a teenage daughter.
With just over five months remaining before their separation, Miles and Rachel avoided discussing their future. Rachel would move to Michigan while he stayed in San Francisco. Their parents' planned marriage would also make them family.
Miles's father announced that he and Lisa would be away until Sunday. Rachel claimed she would stay with a friend, and Miles pretended he had invited Ian over. In reality, the couple planned to spend the weekend together at home.
Miles found it difficult to conceal his feelings in front of their parents. He admired Rachel's intelligence, kindness, and humor, and wished he could proudly introduce her to his father as his girlfriend rather than hide their connection.
Alone together, they pretended the house belonged to them. Rachel cooked while Miles stayed close to her. After dinner, they put on a movie but spent their time kissing instead, finding it increasingly difficult to maintain their boundaries.
Miles took a shower to regain his composure. Rachel joined him, and he tried to reassure her while struggling with his own nervousness. Their closeness intensified the feelings he had repeatedly stopped himself from expressing.
Finally, Miles admitted that he could no longer imagine a future after Rachel left. He told her that she made everything better and declared his love. Afraid she might reject his feelings, he did not initially give her space to answer.
Rachel then told him that she loved him too and was frightened of their relationship ending. Miles reassured her that they would tell their parents after graduation, when living outside the family home would change their circumstances.
He insisted that their parents would have to understand, and Rachel agreed that they could face the situation together. Relieved by their mutual declaration and renewed commitment, they broke their rule against sex.
Characters
Quotes
We don’t talk about what will happen when my father marries her mother. We don’t talk about the fact that when this happens, we’ll be connected for much longer than five months.
I want to tell him I have this really amazing girlfriend whom I want him to meet because he would absolutely love her.
He does love her. Just not in the way I wish he loved her.
“When you move to Michigan and I stay in San Fran? I don’t see anything after that. I used to see whatever future I wanted, but now I don’t see anything.”