A Prayer (Tolstoy)
Short summary
A young mother faced the imminent death of her three-year-old son Kostya, who was dying of water on the brain.
Despite the doctor's hopelessness, she prayed desperately before an icon of the Savior, though she sensed God would act according to His will, not hers. When the boy died, she fell into exhausted sleep.
In her dream, the servant Molly appeared as an angel, explaining why God cannot grant all prayers—some conflict with others, some would harm the petitioners. The mother saw a horrifying vision of Kostya as a debauched old man, understanding that early death might be merciful. Upon waking and seeing her child's body laid out with candles and hyacinths, she kissed his cold forehead.
She suffered, but no longer rebelled or complained; and she knew that what had happened had to be, and was therefore good.
Detailed summary
Division into chapters is editorial.
Death of the child and initial despair
A young mother emerged from the nursery where her three-year-old son lay dying of water on the brain. In desperate denial, she confronted her husband and the doctor who had been speaking in hushed tones.
No, no, no! It can't be... Doctor! Surely something can be done? Why do neither of you speak?
The doctor's bowed head and silence revealed the hopelessness of the situation. Her husband tried to comfort her, but she angrily returned to the nursery. There, the boy lay in his nurse's arms with open but unseeing eyes, foam bubbling from his lips.
The mother took her son briefly but quickly handed him back to the nurse, unable to bear the sight. For two weeks she had alternated between despair and hope, praying desperately before an icon of the Saviour that bore the inscription about giving rest to the weary and heavy laden. Despite her fervent prayers, she felt God would do His will, not hers.
The dream begins: Molly as angel explains prayer
When the mother learned of her son's death, she felt something snap in her head. She collapsed on her bed and fell into unconsciousness. In her sleep, she saw Kostya alive and healthy, playing with his toys. She questioned why God, to whom she had prayed so earnestly, would let her innocent child die.
Why should God—to whom I prayed so earnestly—let him die? Why should God wish it?... He did no harm to anyone...
In her dream, Molly the under-nurse appeared, but she was also an angel. The mother wondered why this angel had no wings, remembering someone had told her there were angels without wings now.
Molly explained that God cannot grant all prayers because people often ask for conflicting things. She gave the example of Russians praying for victory over the Japanese while the Japanese also prayed for victory, with only one Father for all. The mother protested that her case was different - she only asked that her darling boy not be killed.
It is impossible for Him to grant all prayers. People often ask such things, that to please one would mean offending another...
Molly continued explaining that God cannot extract evil from people like a splinter - each person must try for themselves. She compared it to a fairy tale about a magic seed that made learning unnecessary, ultimately harming the boy who possessed it. Similarly, God cannot take away people's struggles, as they must overcome them themselves.
The vision of the childs possible future
Suddenly Molly transformed into a strange, indefinite being that spoke directly to the mother's heart. This mysterious creature challenged her perspective, pointing out that she saw Kostya only as he was recently, but he had not always been that way.
Pitiful, blind, self-confident creature! You see your Kóstya as he was a week ago... But was he always like that?
The being reminded her of Kostya's development from nothing to a crying newborn, then to a suckling, crawling child, and walking toddler. It explained that all people flow like a river toward death, never remaining the same for even a minute.
You all flow like a river; and as a stone drops downwards, you are all hastening towards death, which sooner or later awaits every one of you.
The being revealed what Kostya would have become: a bloated, wrinkled old man in a restaurant, drunk and leering at a depraved woman. The mother recoiled in horror, recognizing something of Kostya's features in this repulsive vision.
Awakening and acceptance
The mother awoke to find Kostya's body had been washed and laid out with candles burning around him. His face appeared waxen and rigid, bearing a dreadful resemblance to the old man from her dream. She kissed his cold forehead and crossed hands, and the scent of hyacinths reminded her that he was truly gone.
For the first time, she wept - not with despair, but with resigned tenderness. She no longer rebelled or complained, understanding that what had happened was necessary and therefore good. The nurse comforted her, saying tears would sadden the child's soul, and that he was now a sinless angel.
Had he lived, who knows what might have become of him?