Too Dear! (Tolstoy)
Short summary
Monaco, late 19th century. The tiny kingdom survived on gambling revenue from its casino. When a murder occurred for the first time, the King faced an unprecedented problem.
The criminal was sentenced to death, but guillotine rental from France cost 16,000 francs and from Italy 12,000 francs. The King deemed this too expensive and commuted the sentence to life imprisonment. A guard watched the prisoner and brought him meals, costing over 600 francs yearly.
To save money, they dismissed the guard, but the prisoner refused to escape. When told to leave, he protested:
You have treated me badly. It is not fair... you sentenced me to death you ought to have executed me; but you did not do it... now you actually want me to go away!
Finally, they offered him a 600-franc annual pension to emigrate. He accepted, moved just across the border, started market gardening, and lived comfortably, occasionally visiting Monaco's gaming tables.
Detailed summary
Division into chapters is editorial.
The tiny kingdom of Monaco and an unprecedented murder
Monaco was a tiny kingdom on the Mediterranean shore between France and Italy, with only seven thousand inhabitants and barely an acre of land per person. Despite its small size, it maintained all the trappings of a real monarchy with a palace, courtiers, ministers, and an army of sixty men. The kingdom survived financially through taxes and a special gaming house where people played roulette, providing the main source of royal revenue since other European gambling establishments had been banned due to the harm they caused.
A few years ago, an unprecedented murder occurred in this peaceful kingdom. The judges assembled with great ceremony and conducted a proper trial with prosecutors, jurymen, and barristers. They condemned the criminal to death by beheading, and the sentence was confirmed by the King.
The expensive problem of execution: seeking help from France and Italy
The kingdom faced a significant problem: they had neither a guillotine nor an executioner. The Ministers decided to inquire with the French Government about borrowing equipment and an expert. France replied that they could supply both for 16,000 francs. When this was presented to the King, he was appalled by the cost.
Sixteen thousand francs! The wretch is not worth the money, said he. Can't it be done, somehow, cheaper? Why 16,000 francs is more than two francs a head on the whole population.
A Council was called to find alternatives. They decided to contact the King of Italy, hoping a fellow monarch might offer better terms. The Italian Government responded with a more reasonable offer of 12,000 francs including travel expenses, but this still seemed too expensive for the small kingdom's budget.
The Ministers considered whether one of their soldiers could perform the execution in a rough manner. The General was consulted about finding a soldier willing to undertake the task, reasoning that soldiers were trained to kill in war.
Failed attempts to find a local executioner
The General approached his soldiers, but none would accept the job.
No, they said, we don't know how to do it; it is not a thing we have been taught... What was to be done? Again the Ministers considered and reconsidered.
After assembling Commissions, Committees, and Subcommittees, they finally decided to alter the death sentence to life imprisonment. This would demonstrate the King's mercy while being more economical. The only problem was the lack of a suitable prison, but they managed to find an adequate place and stationed a guard to watch the prisoner and fetch his food from the palace kitchen.
Life imprisonment and the costly prisoner who wont leave
After a year, the King noticed the prisoner's upkeep cost over 600 francs annually. Considering the man was young and healthy and might live fifty more years, this expense was alarming. The King ordered his Ministers to find a cheaper solution. They decided to dismiss the guard, expecting the criminal to escape.
However, the criminal simply came to the kitchen at dinnertime, collected his food, returned to prison, and locked himself in. When the Minister of Justice confronted him about not escaping, the man explained his predicament.
You have ruined my character by your sentence, and people will turn their backs on me. Besides, I have got out of the way of working. You have treated me badly.
The pension solution and the prisoners comfortable retirement
The Council concluded they must offer him a pension to leave. They fixed the amount at 600 francs annually, and the prisoner agreed to go on condition of regular payment. He received one-third in advance and emigrated just across the frontier, where he bought land and started market-gardening.
It is a good thing that he did not commit his crime in a country where they do not grudge expense to cut a man's head off, or to keeping him in prison for life.